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Old 01-21-2004, 06:27 PM #43
bluelite
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much better version of the joke, thanks. I suck at telling jokes. Highlights why I love my video system though, lol.
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Old 01-21-2004, 06:29 PM #44
Whelan999 (Banned)
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ok the one above mine was much like it lol i never read. but anyway two versions!
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Old 01-21-2004, 06:43 PM #45
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" Oh Ohhhh. Sorry Officer..... I uhhhh.. I didn't know I couldn't do that."
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Old 01-21-2004, 06:46 PM #46
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officer: You have any idea how fast you were going sir?
me: yea so?
officer: Can i see some lisence and registration please sir?
me: blow me
not funny at all but hey i laughed at all the stupid ones too
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Old 01-21-2004, 06:48 PM #47
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*looks back at trunk* "It puts the lotion on it's skin and stops making noise."
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Old 01-21-2004, 06:56 PM #48
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"Don't let your eyes deceive you officer, I'm actually black"
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Old 01-21-2004, 07:10 PM #49
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officer- do you know how fast you were going?

you- no, I was asleep


I did that once, but I was the passanger and I was stoned out of my mind
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Old 01-21-2004, 07:11 PM #50
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Cop: "Can I see your license sir?"
Cheech: "Uhh ya isn't it on the back of the car"
A butchered Cheech and Chong quote but you get the jist of it.
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Old 01-21-2004, 08:16 PM #51
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Quote:
Originally posted by elTwitcho
"Don't let your eyes deceive you officer, I'm actually black"
ROFL!
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Old 01-21-2004, 08:21 PM #52
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just found on ebaums...

Two men are driving through London when they get pulled over by a cop. The cop walks up and taps on the window with his stick. The driver rolls down the window and WHACK, the officer smacks him in the head with the stick. The driver asks, "What the hell was that for?" The officer answers, "You're in London son. When we pull you over, you better have your license ready when we get to your car." The driver says, "I'm sorry, Officer, I'm not from around here." The officer does a check on the driver's license, and he's O.K.. He gives the man his license back, walks around to the passenger side and taps on the window. The passenger rolls down the window and WHACK, the officer smacks him on the head with the stick. The passenger asks, "What'd you do that for?" The officer says, "Just making your wish come true." The passenger asks, "Making what wish come true?" The officer says, "I know that two miles down the road you're gonna say to your friend here, "I wish that a*shole would've tried that sh*t with me!"
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Old 01-21-2004, 08:26 PM #53
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Haha, that last one is pretty much true :p
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Old 01-21-2004, 08:26 PM #54
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and i have tha winner

cop- can i see you license and registration please

u - sure

cop - sir r u drunk ?

u - no no no i swear to drunk im not god


=D =D =D
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Old 01-21-2004, 08:35 PM #55
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A guy gets pulled over.
police man: license and registraytion please
person: kills self
police man: drive away
person:

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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Old 01-21-2004, 08:42 PM #56
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"ossifer, I swear to drunk im not God"
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Old 01-21-2004, 08:58 PM #57
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Cop- are there any wepons on you sir?

you- the car, muhahahahahaha

and get this evil genius look on your face.
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Old 01-21-2004, 09:13 PM #58
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"thanks for the ticket....will u do me a favor....Tell your wife i need my underwear back...thanks"

Officer- Do you know how fast you were going son?"

Tommy- Well this baby has a 457 Hemi in it, of course i don't open her up unless im chasin a cute chic in a ferarri......I'd say about 65....

Officer- 7! you were going 7 miles an hour, and normally when i pull someone over they pull over on the side of the road.."

jump a scene.....

Tommy-Yea, im transporting this guy back to nevada where he's wanted for banging horses and doing a begal (sp)"

Officer- Dear god don't u think you can get him out of this state a little faster than 7 officer......."

tommy- Meoff....Jack

Classic Tommy boy, sorry if i butchered it....
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Old 01-21-2004, 09:52 PM #59
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Officero you know what you were doing wrong?

Person:Yes, officer, and I'm sorry..you see, while I was reaching for my gun, the brick of marijuana on my lap fell forward and landed on my accelerator, and unfortunately, in my confusion, the open beer i had spilled into my mouth...but dont worry, it wont happen again.
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Old 01-21-2004, 10:03 PM #60
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" The speed limit does not apply to robots."
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Old 01-21-2004, 10:12 PM #61
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OINK OINK OINK
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