So my ***** of a boss (We'll call her **** McMurphy) decided to flip ****. I am out of town at my summer home, so **** McMurphy mailed me the note, because it was soooooo urgent, it couldn't wait until I got back. She wants me to sign it and mail it back in. I'm mailing it back, but I am not signing it until she revises this copy and sends me a new one.
I'll probably get fired. I'm not even a grammar Nazi, I'm just giving her back what she gave me: a *****y attitude and a yeast infection
For Reference, I work at a veterinary clinic. The ***** isn't even my boss, she just puts together the schedule and orders the food.
So, I gave it to her today around 4pm, but before I did, I showed the co-workers of mine that also despise this crazy *****. It goes a lil' something like this:
(CAPS signifies yelling.)
Me: "I'm not going to sign this."
**** McMurphy: "If you want your job you will."
M: "You do not have the authorization to fire me. Plus, it requires your parents to sign it."
*At this point, she gives me a puzzled look. I hand her the document, and watch that puzzled look turn into a look of rage, complete with veins exploding from her forehead.*
C: "WHAT IS THIS? WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? I'M YOUR ELDER, YOU MUST RESPECT ME! EXPLAIN YOURSELF!"
M: "How can I respect someone who's literacy level is lower than the president's?"
C: "SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! YOU ARE IN HIGH SCHOOL! I KNOW HOW TO SPEAK ENGLISH!"
M: "But you can't write it."
*At this time, Dr. W intervenes.*
Dr. W: "What is the meaning of this screaming?"
Me: "She said she was going to fire me because I wouldn't sign her note"
Dr. W: "What note? She can't fire you. Only Dr. K and I can fire people in this office."
**** McMurphy: "I sent out a note to all of the kennel attendants asking them to please clean more."
Dr. W to Me: "Let me see this note."
*I thought I was going to get fired at this very moment*
Dr. W: "You wrote this, **** McMurphy?"
C: "Yes, very quickly I jotted..."
M: "You told Heather you wouldn't give it to her until you proofread...."
Dr. W: "STOP BICKERING. John, (me)this was a very, very mean thing to do. **** McMurphy, you know you cannot boss around the kennel attendants like this. This is not the first time we have had this discussion. John (me), are you working this shift?"
Me: "No, sir."
Dr. W: "Ok. I am going to write you up. (first write up ever, we get 3 and a warning and then we get fired). You can leave now."
So, I left.
I got a call about 10 minutes ago from the old lady that works the front desk. After hearing those precious words grace her wrinkled, crusty lips, I realized that ST needed to hear this.
Ruth: "Jesus? It's Ruth"
Me: "I'm sorry, I think you have the wrong numer."
R: "It's me, Ruth, from the clinic."
M: "Oh, hey, how are you? My name is john by the way (awkward laugh - I thought it was the Alzheimer's kicking in)"
R: "Overjoyed. I just thought you were Jesus."
Ruth: *begins singing* "Ding dong the wicked witch, the wicked witch, the wicked witch, Ding Dong the wicked witch is dead!"
M: "Okay, Goodnight. I'll see you next week."
*This was a true WTF? moment*
R: "Wait! I forgot to tell you the good news!"
M: "And what is that?"
R: "**** McMurphy got fired! After 24 years! You did it!"
I'm completely flabbergasted. I thought I was the one that was getting fired. Apparently what happened was she flipped out on the doctor when he told her she was getting a suspension w/o pay from work. Then, she started throwing syringes at him, in which point he called the police and she was arrested and charged with an aggravated battery, because she stuck him in the forearm with a syringe, although empty, that once had rabies vaccine in it.
Dr. W dropped the charges, and fired her. The staff is now planning a party in celebration of me, and they are framing the letter.
She was one crazy psycho *****.