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Old 11-06-2012, 03:46 AM #1
rexisme
 
 
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Where to draw the line with people/kids...or how?

Any suggestions?

Long story short (as possible). I've got a kid that does not leave me alone at the field. Literally, its like I have a tail. Now it has gotten so bad though, he's closer than a tail. The kid is literally at my ****ing hip. Any closer and he could check my prostate.

Its getting worse and worse. Part of it is my fault due to me being nice to him, letting him shoot my old dm, etc. But now, I can clearly tell why none of the other people at the field talk to him. If I turn around, I run into him. If I run to my left, he's in my way. If I go to a bunker, he's right next to me, even if its meant for 1 man. Often times, this results in both of us getting out. Simply put, he's annoying.

I deal with it because I feel bad for him, it seems like his parents just drop him off at the field for the 8 hours to use it as a all day baby sitter. But, the kid is ruining my good time as well. My wife says that eventually he will go away but, I'm on my 7th outing now and its the same.

I started playing paintball again to get rid of aggression and relieve some stress. I go alone because its my time to myself. I realize its a team sport but at the same time, I have fun, playing as a team with the other people. Not with some kid hooked to my hip. I didn't pay as much as I did for all my gear to babysit some kid, I also didnt' pay my admission and FPO price to babysit someone elses kid.

So, does anyone have any suggestions on how to deal with this? If it wasn't a kid, I wouldnt be open to suggestions, I'd be straight up brutally honest with the person. But he can't be any older than 14 and I dont think he could deal with just how painfully blunt and to the point I am.
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Old 11-06-2012, 04:50 AM #2
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Ah I know how you feel. I've always been a real nice guy to kids in general so I've had my share of "followers".

You could either just stop talking to him and ignore him, but that may not work completely.

To get him out of your way on the field, try assigning him a job to do. "go ___ and shoot ____". Maybe that'll even boost his confidence a bit, and he'll open up to other players and not be so awkward.
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Old 11-06-2012, 06:46 AM #3
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You might talk to the ref and see if he/she can make sure to keep you opposite team of the kid. And also just tell the kid you like him but back off abit. When playing tell him what to do, go here shoot there, ect.. You gotta remember your his hero, and sounds like the only person who pays any attention to him.


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Old 11-06-2012, 09:26 AM #4
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I think the choice is up to how you feel about how much effort you're willing to put in vs how rude you're willing to accept being.

If you don't want to invest effort and are willing to be rude...yeah, ignore him or use the field personnel to keep him away from you.

If you're willing to invest some effort, I would suggest going the "teaching" route. Talk to him for a couple minutes before each game to plan *his* strategy for the game....and now that you know where he's going you're free to adjust as you wish.

If you make him self sufficient, he's less likely to leech on you constantly (though it certainly won't incent him to leave you alone entirely).


I don't propose that this is your job or responsibility....but if you're willing to put in the effort, it's likely to be a good thing.
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Old 11-06-2012, 10:07 AM #5
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dude. just tell the kid to give you space. stop feeling bad. youre not a bad guy if you say hey man look i like playing with you and stuff but please can you give me some space, we are always running into each other and stuff. learn how to play this game without my help. you are a nice kid and all but please give me space. he will back off. if he doesnt talk to him again. just be up front about it.
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Old 11-06-2012, 10:45 AM #6
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those "little kids" are called Ewoks just listen to some of them when they get shot and they always follow you.
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Old 11-06-2012, 11:07 AM #7
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Maybe have a talk with his parents when they show up to pick him up. Explain to them what is going on and im sure they will have a chat with him about it and after this he probaly wont be attached at the hip
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Old 11-06-2012, 11:17 AM #8
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Be an ambassador and maybe you can turn this issue into a blessing.
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Old 11-07-2012, 08:38 AM #9
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Rex you have been given a blessing and a challenge all rolled up in to one. Teach him, explain that under foot is too close. Instruct him, obviously the kid has issues outside if parents are just using PB as a babysitter. Don't lend your markers (That could create a following in itself) but do take the opportunity to teach him, you might just be the only good role model the kid has.
With that said it is "your time" get others involved with him to spread the load, you got him with you grab up a few other young ones, and direct them to do something useful, not be fodder. You may end up creating friendship for him, getting him the support he might actually need. Dive a little deeper into it to free up more time for yourself. And this is the most important part: Never be to busy for a child.
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Old 11-07-2012, 09:34 AM #10
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You keep saying "kid," but i keep hearing "meat shield."




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Old 11-07-2012, 05:02 PM #11
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Ah thats sad. Hopefully he will come around a build a strong bond with others on the field as well.
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Old 11-08-2012, 10:01 AM #12
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Use him to your advantage. Give him assignments and you cant go wrong. He will either do them and get out of your way or he wont and you have a good reason to get some space. Hes p
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Old 11-09-2012, 10:04 AM #13
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I think he is just looking up to you as a role model or even possibly if he doesn't have a father, he is looking up to you as a father figure. Like someone else already said just assign him to do things during the game. I don't think ignoring him or avoiding him is a good idea because you could really damage what confidence he has. You could also introduce him to some of your other friends at the field and won't be on your hip any more.
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Old 11-09-2012, 03:56 PM #14
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I have never had this problem.

Mostly like the other people say; talk to the ref about having him on the other team, you could assign him to do things, or even just talk to the kid. Just say hey can I have some space while playing? When I play I need to be able to move freely. Can you try bumping up to another bunker instead of mine?

I would just tell him that you need space.
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Old 03-07-2013, 12:54 PM #15
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AWWWWW!!!!! you have a little fan. I have a couple of those where I play. Be patient and teach him. Just let him know if he's going to be following you around that you expect him to to do certain things. Scout out ahead,lay cover fire and get to know some of the other regular players. The two little guys that followed me around. Have upped there games and where they were once shy and scared are now little beasts on the field. I just sit back and watch. Now they ask me where I'm going on the field and they go the opposite side. Sometimes they do a great job, sometimes they don't. But they always have alot of fun. So mission accomplished. It took awhile to for this transformation to take place but now they've got some of their own fans and we call them the wonder twins. Now to the darkside of this story. Both of these kids told me later that their home lives were pretty ****ty. Alcoholic dad and mothers who just didn't want to be bothered. On Sundays, when we played was the best part of their weeks if only for a few hours. I told them to keep their grades up and things will only get better. And when we play on Sundays to enjoy themselves and leave all the other crap behind. Now I see them as little paintball brothers. Sometimes we play on the same team. Sometimes we don't but it's all good.

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Old 03-07-2013, 01:35 PM #16
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The 2nd worst thing you could do (besides be a dick to him) which would also be mildly humorous.. Is to suddenly grab him and use him as a bunker right before you both get torched.. Lmao

What the other people said though about coaching him. I've had kids like that follow me around. Usually not THAT bad, but if you teach them some things they usually don't hug your nuts so close.
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Old 03-07-2013, 01:38 PM #17
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What I would do, if I were in your situation, is as nicely as possible tell him to back off a bit. Explain to him that you don't mean to sound rude or mean, but he's hovering and that's not good behavior. If he respects you like you say he does, I think he'll understand.
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Old 03-07-2013, 05:21 PM #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rexisme View Post
Any suggestions? ... I dont think he could deal with just how painfully blunt and to the point I am.
yep. teach him a thing or two about being a man... and get over yourself.
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Old 03-07-2013, 05:36 PM #19
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I've never had it that bad, but the few times I've had clingers, I give them assignments. 'i'm going left, you go right, i'm counting on you to go right...'

It usually works, once or twice they just followed me anyway.
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Old 03-07-2013, 05:44 PM #20
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This is the reason I'm known as the "shy guy" at the field. The only way to get me to talk is to Piss me off. I prefer to be alone and mind my own business.
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Old 03-07-2013, 07:31 PM #21
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Sorry man I didn't know I was bothering you.. You're my hero and all I want is to be just like you when I grow up...... Hahaha j/k I'm not that kid..
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