[Gamron]

HAHA thats funny as hell

[galli2001]

And you wont say what was in it?

Freshmen year homecoming we were all to meet at a kid's house for pictures. I get there and my friend Cam and his date are there as well as his date's bestfriend who went stag. Im waiting there for everyone else to get there. My dates parent's are there and the dad comes up to me and shakes my hand and says, "You must be Justin". I kiss his *** pretty much and all that then he goes... "Look, if you touch my daughter or do anything to her, I will know. I will hunt you down... and break your legs. Got it?". I glance over at my friend and his date scared as hell and they were just starring scared too. After my date got there, we sat around taking pictures for like 30 minutes. I kept glancing over at the dad and he would just stare at me. I was scared the the rest of the night.

[JoshGrrrr]

No....I don't think you get it. That whole story was made up so you would ask "What was in the bag?" So I could reply "None of your goddamn business".

The first story about the fat retarted kid was true though.

[Ace_Paintballer]

Last weekend i was at a friends house, his mom was serving us all sorts of alcohol, beer and hard stuff, and was drinking with us and talking with us. I swear I was so nervous even taking a sip of my beer with her sitting there. She then payed for us all to go down to a hookah bar downtown, weird ****. This is on the kid's 15th birthday btw and theyre french (what else could they be)

[Insane Llamas]

well ive had my dad walk in on me when my x was on to of me. jus kinda walked in said dinners ready and walked out. reeeeallly weird sitn at the table that nite.

pullin the valve stem outa 9 senoirs tires on there cars durin jr sr war 2 years ago and then the next day havin my name called over the entire school sayin i needed in the school office that very minute.

smoke bombin the school parkin lot and drivin off only to find a firetruck and a police car flyin in the general direction of the school, then havin my(now x)gf's mom call us and tell they know we did it and we were expelled (she was lyin but scared the **** outa me)

[kurt90]

me and 2 other friends were in a room and 1 started to dry hump the other and the kids dad walked in(the 1 that was getting humped) and it was a really odd silence and then we laughed after, but it still felt really weird

[SoCalDave]

The other day my friend and i were in p.e .(i'm taking it in advance, i didn't fail dont ask) and we went were in this hallway that leads to the gymn and lockers. Anyway we found this open door which i guess was the fottbal player's locker and no one was in it and it was totally dark. So my friend, 2 girls, and i go into the room, take 3 steps b4 a sensor light turns the light on. So i cracked the door slightly to see where the coaches were, and of course the biggest ugliest douche one was walking by and looked at me so we walked out cuz it was obvous we were in there. The coach started yelling "what were you kids doing in there????11!!1one!!!!?" So i was like "yeah i thought i saw a wild animal go in there" and when i was talking i somhow managed tog et around the coach when he was focused on my friends or something because i just walked past him. I felt kinda bad because my friends got yelled at in front of everyone and i used my ninja skills to disappear.

[paintball snipy]

Originally posted by krazyKarl
when your dad is looking through the internet history when you forgot to delete the porno sites

word lol

[B3hemoth]

damn post delay

[Paintball]

Originally posted by .lb.
Me n' this girl were in the back of the movies just making out. Then she sticks her hand down my pants, and a few seconds later the people in front of us turn around and see that her hand is down my pants, and I kind of just smiled at them and the turned back around, the rest of the movie felt awkward.

I was on a double date, and this happened. The other two saw her hand in my pants....but all four of us are still friends. Only difference is the other two are still together, lol.

Like 3-4 months ago, during my last 2 months of highschool there was this girl that I had a crush on for like all four years of highschool, but she had a boyfriend at the time. Well, I found out by talking to her that she had a crush on me for a long time too...and yet she had already had a boyfriend that was out of HS. Well, we started spending a LOT of time together and eventually she cheated on her boyfriend with me, not sex, just like making out and third base and stuff. We ended up going to prom together, but on prom day....she was like "Caleb, I'm sorry but I realized that I was just in a fight with (her bf) and I fled to you for comfort."

I was like.....aaaaaaaahhhhhhh ****. My prom sucked bawls and was akward as hell. Needless to say, I don't talk to the girl anymore.... Still pisses me off to this day though

[MonkeyG]

everyone said a kid in my math class wanked it off, and someone told the teacher and he got called to the office the next day, but anyways, my friends mom is a dirty **** and like 3 times when ive been over she had her boyfriend over and i could hear her screaming, and my friends found the used condoms and she had a jackhammer in her drawer

[Schnapp]

i was in my friends basement with his other friend. Were just hangin out when his dad comes down. He kinda runs downt he stairs quickly, idk, i guess tryin to catch us doing sometihng (i assume like beer or w/e) he goes " o ok, just makin sure you guys are not experimenting or w/e, you never know what guys are into these days" not reffering to alchohol, but having gay sex. I felt kinda weird staying in the basement after that.

[Kutan]

When my bestfriend's (yes my best friend is a girl) mom asked me how I knew what jizz smells and looks like.

[Blood_Eyed]

My dad walked in on me having sex on the floor and all he said was "uhhh, when your done can I talk to you for a second" too bad my mom beat the hell out of me with a damn yard stick.

or

another wierd situation i had to live through was wen i got poison ivy on my balls, still havent figured out how that happened.

[Pablo2K4]

Eating dinner with my friend and his mom the night after I tried to make a pass at her(the mom).

[skitsoKID911]

yeah the history and the porn thing is the worst. but when i was in the 8th grade i was in the lunch line. a retarded kid like looked at me and was like. YOU WANNA FIGHT. and i was like uhh wtf mate. and he was all like LETS GO. and the retarded teacher ppl came in and were like WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM. i was like i didnt do anything. and they were like JORDAN WOULDNT JUST LASH OUT LIKE THAT. and i was like well he just did. and i got sent to the principle and they called my mom. and the whole time i was just sitting there like okay...

[NightyNite]

I went with my golf team up north for a tournament, on the van trip home one of our players asked for a cell, so I let him use mine, he knew mine had internet, so he did a search for "penis" and opened up all the things that came up, which were all mostly pictures. So I find out, and grab my phone back, and "delete" all that ****. And then the AT&T bill comes and it shows what my phone did on the internet, so I had to explain to my parntes that I didn't do it, and that I wasn't gay.

[Xer0]

Today three friends and I were ordering food. While I was waiting for them to finish ordering, this tweaker chick comes in and orders an "ice water to go" (which is funny in itself, because apparently she thinks that a cup to go is different than a cup if you stay). We were talking and someone said something funny, so we were laughing and the tweaker chick is over there like 10 feet away from us cracking up and smiling non-stop looking straight ahead. She had no ****ing idea what we were talking about.

Let me just describe her before I continue. She looked about 30, her face was as red as a tomato, she had old clothes on with a super sized shirt, and short, butch hair.

So back to the story. I was standing there behind the area where you order, and she runs up to me and yells "THIS IS HOW BIG THEIR ICE WATER IS, CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?", smiling the whole time. She was two inches away from my face so I backed up and she kept moving forward, I ran out of space and ended up against a wall and then she just left.

After she left, my phone rang so I went outside to answer it. While I was on the phone, I looked over and saw the tweaker chick sitting at the bus stop that was across the parking lot, talking to some poor random guy. The bus came, he got on, she got up and walked off.

[goosen]

one time during math class, i was half asleep, like in the zone right before you are zonked out, well i had my hand on my chin holding my head up and my hand slipped out from under my chin and my head started to fall, soon as i lost stability and i wasnt resting on my chin anymore i yelled "Jesus" really loud. Alot of people just looked at me like wtf are you talking about.

[chrisxninja]

Originally posted by goosen
one time during math class, i was half asleep, like in the zone right before you are zonked out, well i had my hand on my chin holding my head up and my hand slipped out from under my chin and my head started to fall, soon as i lost stability and i wasnt resting on my chin anymore i yelled "Jesus" really loud. Alot of people just looked at me like wtf are you talking about.

haha this one time in class a friend of mine chucked an over sized leapord skin tennis ball and it beaned a kid in the head. The kid was like. "WHAT THE ****?"at the top of his lungs. Everyone in the class and the teacher thought he was just saying it randomly, he probably felt akward.

[Oc_rage]

damn some of thesse are the funniest around but i have a new one. i was watching porn and my grandma came in the door and i just quickly changed the channels