Bear with me ST, this is a long serious post with no tl;dr. If you don't want to read it go ahead and go back to ST.
This thread reminded me of something that happened last night. After I attempted to explain it I realized it was so long that nobody in that thread would read it, but if I make a thread, maybe one or two people will. It has been happening to me the past few months, so I figured I'd share and see if anyone has had any similar experiences. This might not make any sense, but it's fascinating to me because it always leaves me dumbfounded in awe
Basically every night when I go lay in bed my mind goes in crazy thinking mode, as I've always kinda assumed most everyone's does. That is I think about whatever interesting topic is on my mind that needs contemplating, sometimes deep philisophical ideas, sometimes just whatever I'm currently interested in, like music, etc. Anyways, my thoughts leap from one place to another throughout the night, for maybe an hour, sometimes more, until I fall asleep. That is, I'll be thinking about one thing, and as I'm drawing out a complete thought, but not finished yet, I'll jump to something else. As if I'm writing an essay, and a few paragraphs in, mid sentence, I bounce off and open a new word document and start another. I'll often keep doing this until I hit a dead end and I'll backtrack. By that I mean I'll be thinking about something that doesn't hold as much interest to me as one of the previous thoughts did, so I will go back and continue where I left off on the previous thought, until I branch off again. This happens every single night before I go to bed, in pretty much that same manner, and I like I said, I've always kind of figured when most people go to sleep (not watching tv or listening to music or something) that they go through something similar. Presumably nothing out of the ordinary, it's been happening since I was a child.
So every now and then this will go on, and I'll be jumping from thought to thought, each linked by something that was interesting enough to cause my mind to branch off into an entirely new direction, and suddenly, my perspective changes. I'm no longer creating the thoughts, but I'm observing myself think, and I'm baffled by how these thoughts, now incoherent without someone directing them, without someone linking them logically, (at least, not logical on a basic enough level for an observer to notice) sharply jump from idea to idea, at an exponentially increasing rate in a single instant. Then immediately it all comes to a complete halt and I'm only left with the thought that the "train of thought" ended at. I've got no idea why I'm thinking about this specific thought, I have no idea how I got here, I'm completely lost in my own mind. Like I said I've been using this "method" of sorts to think about various topics every night for years, but only recently, since I've been becoming somewhat of an outside observer, have I realized how it works. This moment where my perspective shifts is most eerie because I believe it happens the instant before I would have fallen asleep, before my consciousness switches off, or rather seemingly switches on.
It is hard enough to reconcile this experience at all, but describing it to someone else is near impossible. I'll try to use an analogy along with the "train of thought" idea. Let's say there is a train, and this train is my current state of consciousness, it is what I am currently experiencing. I am sitting in the front of the train, controlling it completely, as if it is not even on tracks. This is business as usual. Now this experience I've been having would be if I stopped paying attention to controlling the train, and then suddenly I accidentally fell out. I'm now on the ground, looking at this train pass, and it suddenly accelerates at an alarming rate, out of control. The only thing that is not out of control is the path, the railroad tracks- the train is headed directly towards a dark tunnel, ie what seems to be a change in consciousness, sleeping. Then right as the train is at maximum velocity, right before it enters the tunnel, the tunnel disappears, the train is going at normal speed again, and I'm in it controlling everything, just as before, except now I know what inevitably will soon happen to the train when the driver falls asleep. It is as if the train knew I wasn't in it right before it entered the tunnel, so it restarted, letting me in before it went to this other place. That's a relatively simplified way of explaining it, not a perfect analogy but it hopefully helps you understand what I'm talking about.
It's just so fascinating to me because it's almost like waking up from a dream, except it's more like waking up from reality. I never really was dreaming, I was there the entire time, but I started to see my mind not doze off, but rather speed up and change direction as my thoughts started to switch into another consciousness. It's a similar feeling to when you catch yourself falling asleep in class or something, and you wake up as your head starts to fall over, right before/as you are falling asleep. You know your body was falling asleep; you know the feeling. You also know that you only snapped out of it because your relaxed head falling caught your attention. But what was your mind doing? What were your thoughts? Have you ever caught your mind falling asleep?
This has only happened recently, maybe a few times every month for the past few months. idk why I'm sharing this, that thread just reminded me to think about this, because after it happens I fall asleep soon after and never think to remind myself of the next morning. Then I forget about it until it happens again.
try this. your laying in bed thinking about something like say your thinking about yourself observing your thoughts from a distance and then you think what am i thinking about right now? im thinking about what im thinking about and now im thinking about me thinking about what im thinking about and it goes on like that forever
That analogy was pretty elaborate and actually helped me understand what you were trying to convey. Would be pretty interesting to experience something like that. Now it's tie between sleep paralysis and this.
try this. your laying in bed thinking about something like say your thinking about yourself observing your thoughts from a distance and then you think what am i thinking about right now? im thinking about what im thinking about and now im thinking about me thinking about what im thinking about and it goes on like that forever
i do that quite frequently and it trips me out
Some of the most foundation shaking terrifying moments of my life have been when I've thought of something very similar to that while on acid
I always think about what happens after death, if god is real, a bunch of paranormal stuff, or what happens during my dreams before I go to sleep. I hardcore daydream too, and I can't snap out of it myself. It can suck at times.
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Originally Posted by The_Hawk: Windows 7 is a great internet browser.
Yea, I usually have a very long experience of falling into and out of sleep and dreams. I've had experiences where I woke and my conscious mind didnt realize I was no longer dreaming, those are funny (woken by the phone, talking to a friend about NONSENSE). I dream very deeply and vividly on a regular basis, and I hate waking up in the morning. but travelling from waking to dreams, I like very much. a vibrant mind is a priceless treasure.
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☼ Josh Grasby, Machinist/Airsmith/Paintballer extraordinaire ☼ If you play with skill, style, class, finesse, honor, integrity,
and all of the above, you play pump.
Yea, I have a very long experience of falling into and out of sleep and dreams. I've had experiences where I woke and my conscious mind didnt realize I was no longer dreaming, those are funny (woken by the phone, talking to a friend about NONSENSE). I dream very deeply and vividly on a regular basis, and I hate waking up in the morning. but travelling from waking to dreams, I like very much. a vibrant mind is a priceless treasure.
Actually, I'm almost 100% in pump forums, and on MCB. moreso, I rarely have time at the PC lately, busy with the Falcon project and the usual social obligations.
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☼ Josh Grasby, Machinist/Airsmith/Paintballer extraordinaire ☼ If you play with skill, style, class, finesse, honor, integrity,
and all of the above, you play pump.
My thoughts tend to go all over the place, yet still related to each other. I usually have this problem in the middle of the night though not when I first lay down. sometime I seem to be watching myself but not always. I tend to also do this at work in a day dream state. My job is so boring a monkey could do it. When I worked 3rd shift is when I had this problem the worst.
If you technically are aware of your body going to sleep, but your mind "stays awake", that could lead to lucid dreaming, which means you are able to control your own body in your dream, rather than just having to go with whatever happens during a regular dream. While lucid dreaming, you are aware that you are sleeping (unlike in regular dreams), which allows you to control yourself and your actions. Supposedly, there are techniques that, with repetition, will allow you to lucid dream at will.
Yea, I usually have a very long experience of falling into and out of sleep and dreams. I've had experiences where I woke and my conscious mind didnt realize I was no longer dreaming, those are funny (woken by the phone, talking to a friend about NONSENSE). I dream very deeply and vividly on a regular basis, and I hate waking up in the morning. but travelling from waking to dreams, I like very much. a vibrant mind is a priceless treasure.
Do you remember dreams vividly? Recently (past few months as well) I've been thinking about my dreams in more and more detail after they happen in the morning, unraveling the memory of them, and reminding myself of them throughout the day. The more I do this, the more I can remember of the next dreams I have, and they become more and more vivid. I really want to start writing them down immediately after I wake up, and recording them all with as much detail as possible.
some dreams I recall very clearly. Lucid dreams happen from time to time (it is possible to increase their frequency if you are so inclined). Focus on dream recall will also strengthen how clear and easily recalled they are.
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☼ Josh Grasby, Machinist/Airsmith/Paintballer extraordinaire ☼ If you play with skill, style, class, finesse, honor, integrity,
and all of the above, you play pump.
... or did I? DUN DUN DUN
