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Old 03-01-2012, 11:10 PM #1
]TSS[ Dake
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CrazyChunk Training

Alright, I figured it was about time we discussed the training methods of legendary lifter/athlete/beardsmith/fellow PbN member, CrazyChunk.
Calling upon his vast knowledge to help novice members (IE everyone who posts in this forum), Chunk helped kickstart many a lifting career. It is actually rumored that Pelto, Lurker, Rob, and Hoodlum followed the CrazyChunk Method (hereafter referred to as the CC method) to achieve the Herculean physiques they have now. So without further adieu, let us examine the pillars of the CC meth.

First base point: Powerful feet.
While Chunk was no doubt a revolutionary, this point of genius hailed from his roots as a simple, observant man. When two blocks of metal are fused, they are only as strong as the weld holding them together. As such, your squat, deadlift, and clean variations can only be as strong as your feet.
Chunk was rumored to have extremely powerful feet, and the legend maintains that he could close a Captains of Crush #3 when he closed his eyes and curled his toes. As such, none of us can really hope to achieve quite a plain of podiatric power. That said, one should still strive to become more Chunk-like in foot training. He reportedly added 40% to his squat and could flutter his feet with so much power that the added lift allowed for an additional two pullups on his max (leading to a grand total of 2).
Recommended work-outs:
Bamboo pinches. Take a stalk of bamboo between your toes, and pinch them to cleave it in half. Work your way through thicker and thicker sprigs. Added bonus of this exercise is that it will work your toe flexibility as your traumatically force the bamboo between your digits.
Dorsiflexion in King Arthur's Court. And avid member of the Society for Creative Anachronism, Chunk wore exclusively iron-clad boots. To utilize this vast opportunity, he was incessantly working the strength of his foot dorsiflexion. He reported bulging the top half of these carbon-steel clogs due to his immense power, though pictures were never produced.

Second anchor for this ship of strength: Numbers Don't Matter.
This is a very important part of the CC Meth. It doesn't matter if you are straining to squat that unloaded EZ bar, as long as you FEEL strong. El Chunkerino is reported to have dropped from a 365 squat to a 225 squat, yet felt stronger. Since he felt stronger, this is undeniable progress. The proof is in the pudding, ladies and gentlemen.
Methods:
Feel it. Don't track numbers, macros, days of the week, bank accounts, etc. Just close your eyes and feel the situation. Chances are, if you feel like a million bucks, you won't have any trouble paying rent this month. It's science. Dr. Phil has done multiple specials on this, and that mother****er was on Oprah.
Swag: ON. Chunk pulled tail. You know why? Because he FELT like he should pull tail. Regardless of how much irreversible liver damage the chloroform may have done, those broads got laid out. Word on the street is they even let him nut inside.

The last stantion of stalwartness: Beard Grooming.
Chunk spent more hours working on his whiskers than he did sleeping. Between constant olive oil rubs and brushing, it is said that his mug felt like a badger neck. If you can't grow a beard, you're ****ed here. Sorry.
Tactics: Olive oil rubs. It should feel like you've been going down on Rachael Ray. If your beard feels and smells like olive oil, you will pull tail. And you'll feel like you're lifting heavier. Which means you are stronger.
Brush Brush. Like this mother****er, but for your face. Brush your beard. Constantly. If you don't have a beard, brush your skin until it is whisked away and the follicles are exposed.

There you have it, gents. All I know about CrazyChunk training. Any methods, advice, or CrazyChunk lore you have to share would be much appreciated.
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Old 03-01-2012, 11:18 PM #2
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Old 03-01-2012, 11:22 PM #3
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Old 03-02-2012, 12:10 AM #4
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spot for sale, as of now

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Old 03-02-2012, 12:15 AM #5
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Lmao Im confused yet intrigued. Want2lernmoar
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Old 03-02-2012, 12:19 AM #6
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what inspired you to write this up, there's some really good advice in here

might have to change my routine
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Old 03-02-2012, 12:23 AM #7
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i heard he was on creatine, is this true




if so we cannot discount the fact that he was not a natural lifter, and his results are not typical
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Old 03-02-2012, 12:24 AM #8
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True, but he was an avid jouster as well, and recent research has shown that the jolts of jousting disintegrate creatine.
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Old 03-02-2012, 12:26 AM #9
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well of course he was on creatine then. he has to replenish his creatine levels or else his spleen would empty, and we all know what happens with an empty spleen.
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Old 03-02-2012, 12:28 AM #10
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My beard is patchy but my tits are superb. Is the CC method good for me?
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Old 03-02-2012, 12:29 AM #11
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Start vigorous brushing.
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Old 03-02-2012, 01:44 AM #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ]TSS[ Dake View Post
Alright, I figured it was about time we discussed the training methods of legendary lifter/athlete/beardsmith/fellow PbN member, CrazyChunk.
Calling upon his vast knowledge to help novice members (IE everyone who posts in this forum), Chunk helped kickstart many a lifting career. It is actually rumored that Pelto, Lurker, Rob, and Hoodlum followed the CrazyChunk Method (hereafter referred to as the CC method) to achieve the Herculean physiques they have now. So without further adieu, let us examine the pillars of the CC meth.

First base point: Powerful feet.
While Chunk was no doubt a revolutionary, this point of genius hailed from his roots as a simple, observant man. When two blocks of metal are fused, they are only as strong as the weld holding them together. As such, your squat, deadlift, and clean variations can only be as strong as your feet.
Chunk was rumored to have extremely powerful feet, and the legend maintains that he could close a Captains of Crush #3 when he closed his eyes and curled his toes. As such, none of us can really hope to achieve quite a plain of podiatric power. That said, one should still strive to become more Chunk-like in foot training. He reportedly added 40% to his squat and could flutter his feet with so much power that the added lift allowed for an additional two pullups on his max (leading to a grand total of 2).
Recommended work-outs:
Bamboo pinches. Take a stalk of bamboo between your toes, and pinch them to cleave it in half. Work your way through thicker and thicker sprigs. Added bonus of this exercise is that it will work your toe flexibility as your traumatically force the bamboo between your digits.
Dorsiflexion in King Arthur's Court. And avid member of the Society for Creative Anachronism, Chunk wore exclusively iron-clad boots. To utilize this vast opportunity, he was incessantly working the strength of his foot dorsiflexion. He reported bulging the top half of these carbon-steel clogs due to his immense power, though pictures were never produced.

Second anchor for this ship of strength: Numbers Don't Matter.
This is a very important part of the CC Meth. It doesn't matter if you are straining to squat that unloaded EZ bar, as long as you FEEL strong. El Chunkerino is reported to have dropped from a 365 squat to a 225 squat, yet felt stronger. Since he felt stronger, this is undeniable progress. The proof is in the pudding, ladies and gentlemen.
Methods:
Feel it. Don't track numbers, macros, days of the week, bank accounts, etc. Just close your eyes and feel the situation. Chances are, if you feel like a million bucks, you won't have any trouble paying rent this month. It's science. Dr. Phil has done multiple specials on this, and that mother****er was on Oprah.
Swag: ON. Chunk pulled tail. You know why? Because he FELT like he should pull tail. Regardless of how much irreversible liver damage the chloroform may have done, those broads got laid out. Word on the street is they even let him nut inside.

The last stantion of stalwartness: Beard Grooming.
Chunk spent more hours working on his whiskers than he did sleeping. Between constant olive oil rubs and brushing, it is said that his mug felt like a badger neck. If you can't grow a beard, you're ****ed here. Sorry.
Tactics: Olive oil rubs. It should feel like you've been going down on Rachael Ray. If your beard feels and smells like olive oil, you will pull tail. And you'll feel like you're lifting heavier. Which means you are stronger.
Brush Brush. Like this mother****er, but for your face. Brush your beard. Constantly. If you don't have a beard, brush your skin until it is whisked away and the follicles are exposed.

There you have it, gents. All I know about CrazyChunk training. Any methods, advice, or CrazyChunk lore you have to share would be much appreciated.
Almost everything you said was pretty much void of all truth. It's almost as if you want people to think you're stupid. Please spend some more time researching before you make any more posts. This is a fitness is forum and people could take poor advice and hurt themselves, and I don't want to see you held responsible for that.
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Old 03-02-2012, 01:46 AM #13
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Sounds like you need to do some research.
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Old 03-02-2012, 02:12 AM #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nikilwig View Post
Almost everything you said was pretty much void of all truth. It's almost as if you want people to think you're stupid. Please spend some more time researching before you make any more posts. This is a fitness is forum and people could take poor advice and hurt themselves, and I don't want to see you held responsible for that.
Please take your own advice.

Some people just can't handle ideologies of this vastitude.
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Last edited by Pump Revolution : 03-02-2012 at 02:16 AM.
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Old 03-02-2012, 08:44 AM #15
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Originally Posted by Nikilwig

Almost everything you said was pretty much void of all truth. It's almost as if you want people to think you're stupid. Please spend some more time researching before you make any more posts. This is a fitness is forum and people could take poor advice and hurt themselves, and I don't want to see you held responsible for that.
Looooool
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Old 03-02-2012, 09:12 AM #16
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Old 03-02-2012, 09:35 AM #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nikilwig View Post
Almost everything you said was pretty much void of all truth. It's almost as if you want people to think you're stupid. Please spend some more time researching before you make any more posts. This is a fitness is forum and people could take poor advice and hurt themselves, and I don't want to see you held responsible for that.

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Old 03-02-2012, 09:43 AM #18
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you've outdone yourself this time, dake.
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Old 03-02-2012, 01:08 PM #19
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Originally Posted by Nikilwig View Post
Almost everything you said was pretty much void of all truth. It's almost as if you want people to think you're stupid. Please spend some more time researching before you make any more posts. This is a fitness is forum and people could take poor advice and hurt themselves, and I don't want to see you held responsible for that.
pls pls pls go..



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Old 03-02-2012, 01:16 PM #20
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Reported for too vast a physique
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Old 03-02-2012, 02:53 PM #21
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