One night Stands and Random Hook-ups.
Originally Posted by drunktiger21
Just a little concern/question/dilemma to expand my horizons:
I have no problem picking up a girl that I want for a long term relationship. I talk to them a lot and get to know them, and soon enough, they tell me they like me..but after a while. No problem
What I want to be able to do is- know how to pick up a girl for a one nighter/hookup?
I have a "friend" who is on the dance team, and we hang out in a group of friends. I'm dating one of her friends, but she also has a couple of other single friends who are pretty cute, so how could I just use them for a hookup/one night stand?
First let me start off by saying I had very few one nigh stands while I was in high school. The bottom line is this is not easy for a couple of reasons:
1) The media today scares the crap out of you kids about teen pregnancy and STDs. Add that to the religious right pushing their “sex = bad” crap on the world and no wonder you kids want to wait. But that’s a whole other can of political worms I don’t want to open up here.
2) High school girls are all about falling in love. Most of them haven’t come to appreciate sex yet and aren’t interested in casual sex.
3) You most likely don’t live on your own, so you can’t just bring a girl back to your place and spend the night with her.
So if you’re a high-schooler, expect a lot of problems finding one night stands.
Let’s get started. First of all we all need morals, decide right now what lines you won’t cross. For instance, I won’t sleep with a woman who’s had more than a couple of drinks. This is to protect her as well as myself. I don’t need some girl screaming rape the next morning because she decides she made a bad decision the night before. Bottom line BE CAREFUL, BE SMART! One night of casual sex isn’t worth 15 years upstate with a black cellmate named “tiny.” If her state of mind questionable keep away, go home and rub one out instead.
When I started having one night stands, I used to think, “god I’m sleeping with such whores because they’re having sex with me after one night of knowing me.” Soon I realized that these girls weren’t whores or ****s, they were normal women who were overcome by their sexual desires. Most of these girls never had one night stands before and a few of them rarely engaged in sex. I soon came to realize that almost ANY woman could be seduced into casual sex.
The trick to one night stands is to tap the woman’s sexual desires. One night stands are not about convincing or persuading a girl to sleep with you. It’s to get a girl so sexually aroused that she wants nothing more than to sleep with you. This is done through slow seduction and comfort building. You are going to need to spend a lot of time with this woman throughout the night. You obviously can’t expect to hook-up with her after 15 minutes. Now when I’m trying to seduce a woman I tone down the cocky/funny a lot. I like my actions to do the talking for me. I show my level of confidence through my actions towards her, instead of my words.
Now I’m going to go on the assumption that you’ve already pulled the interest of this girl. I’m going to start past all the cock/funny and all that crap and move right into how you seduce a woman that’s already interested in you!
First you’re going to have slow sexual escalation throughout the night. It starts with little bits of touching. Putting your hand on her arm when you talk to her is a good place to start. You need to find reasonable excuses to touch her. Dancing is the best one I can think of, especially at a club. Let’s face it, today, dancing is pretty much like ****ing with your clothes on. Don’t spend 3 hours dancing with her and wear her out. Dance for maybe 15 minutes, just long enough to get her a little aroused. I like to think of it as a little 15 tease. A pretty good rule thumb is, the better someone dances, the better they screw.
Next, you’re intentions should not be known. At no point should she know, “this guy wants to take me home.” In fact I usually tease a girl and tell her, “you may be cute, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to let you take me home tonight!” Remember, people want what they think they can’t have. This is the one area you can’t act over confident in. If you act like you know you’re going to screw this girl tonight, she will force herself to stay in control just to spite you. Women fear that if they do things like one night stands they will be viewed as ****s, and if you act cocky like you are going to take her home in one night they equate that as, you view me as a ****! So don’t do that!!!! Anyway, there should be a lot of teasing. Conversations should start having fun little sexual innuendoes in them. That should get stronger and stronger until you’re having rather proactive conversations. You want sex to be on her mind. But don’t let sex dominate the conversation. You don’t want her to think that the only thing on your mind is sex.
A good trick to pull is what we call bouncing. Ever notice how if you go to a lot of different places in one night it seems like a really really long night? Well if you can get a woman to bounce with you to many different places in one night it will feel like she has been with you for a longer period of time. This time illusion helps bring a woman’s guard down.
The other trick is what we call the 2nd night stand. If on the first night you screw up somewhere and give her the vibe you’re aiming for a one night stand, you back away. But then you make solid plans to meet again the next night. She now thinks, “oh okay, I guess he wasn’t interested in a one night stand.” Then on the 2nd night you play it again and hook-up.
After that you need isolate her. She’s not going to start making out with you in front of her friends or yours. This doesn’t have to complicated. Take her out of sight of her friends but close enough that she still feels comfortable. Here’s a great example. We did an after-bar at our house one night after the clubs closed. We brought these girls back to our place. A lot of people are in the main room and front room dancing. But I go into the kitchen with my target and talk to her in there, which leads to more provocative talking which led to making out. Now, in the kitchen, we don’t have the world staring at us, analyzing our actions, but at the same time incase I turn out to be a psycho mass murdering rapist, people she knows and trusts are in the next room.
Finally, we have what I call the pre-sex touching. Now this isn’t foreplay, because foreplay infers that sex is coming next and she may not be ready for that yet. This is where I try to get a back rub. Like my story from last weekend, I had the girl rub my back and as she does that she says, “oh rub my thighs.” This in no way infers that sex is next. You’re simply doing something that feels good. Then you transition this into foreplay. This is kind of a gray area, it’s not clear where it goes from pre-sex to foreplay. But anyway, allow it to slowly escalate to sex. Lead the way but don’t push her. You may experience last minute resistance. This is where the girl says, “stop, we can’t do this, we just met each other.” The best way I’ve found to combat this is to agree. Let your words say one thing and your actions do the other. This is how I deal with last minute resistance.
Her: “stop, we can’t do this, we just met each other.”
Me: I back up a few inches and cut all physical contact and say. “You’re right we should take this slowly.” Then grab her and make out with her like you’re so insanely attracted to her. Kiss her neck and say, something like, “ah we shouldn’t do this but you’re so beautiful!” What you're trying to do here is show her that you relate to how she feels. You want her to see that you also feel this is "wrong" but that you are overcome by your sexual desire for her. I call this leading by example. I show her, "yes i feel the same as you but i just want you so badly," and hope that she relates and does the same thing.
PLEASE BE CAREFUL HERE. The trick is to be aggressive but not overly aggressive. There’s a difference between a woman saying “stop” (work on my nipples and neck and try again in 5 minutes) and “STOP! (I really don’t want to do this.) If you have trouble telling the difference don’t push it!
Finally, be honest about it. Don't tell a girl you're going to call her if you don't plan on it. Don't promise her the world if you aren't going to give it to her. Guys like that give guys like me a bad name. You don't need to lie to a woman to get her to sleep with you. Women are more like us than most guys realize, but they feel the need to be deceptive to tap that female sexual desire. LEAVE HER BETTER THAN YOU FOUND HER!
You shouldn't part in the morning with her feeling upset! If she is, you did something wrong and shame on you!
Originally Posted by cookie123
oh whooops I think I read the convo backwords haha sorry, that wasnt meant for an insult.
and any suggestions for my last post??
How old is this girl?