[BlackLabel767]

Originally Posted by t_mo

She is a ****! or an attention whore.
Discontinue all physical intamacy FROM NOW ON! RIGHT NOW!!!
Especially because you will be living with her next year it would be terrible to get involved in any way shape or form with her!
Start finding, and seeking out other girls and tell her that you dont want her to stay in your bed anymore because you dont want to make your friendship akward, considering you will be living with her next year. Let your roomate screw up his relationship and then probably get involved with her and screw that up too.

Just stop, take a moment and think about how much you are jepordizing your future living situation. Is it worth some needy attention whore?

the answer is NO.

Edit: after re-reading this it sounds like she might have some "daddy" issues. In that she didnt have a strong father figure growing up, try and ask some vague questions to see if she will talk about her father. A lot of crazy girls I have dealt with have some issues with their father/father figure, and it is not worth dealing with them in the least. Especially as a college student.

I don't think she has any "daddy" issues because when she does talk about her dad, she has nothing but good things to say about him. I know I can't get involved with her due to our living arrangements for next year, but it just sucks having to watch her get all over my roommate.

Oh well, I guess I'll just have to hit up the frats this weekend and find some hoodrats to make me feel better.

[Bobeo]

Originally Posted by BraaatttMyGat

Second opinion please!
Somoneo other than JT pimp answer
thanks

Ok, I think I could do with some girl problem help. SO basically there is this girl that I want to hook up with. I see her walking around a lot, but we never say anything. One time she just stared at me, but I had a fever then and I just didn't say anyhting because I was feeling like ****.
I've met her once at a party, but didn't get to talk to her that much, and I don't even know if she knows my name. I still see her a lot walking to class. SO what should I do?!??!?!
thanks ST

Read through all 3 Girl Problem Threads and then come back with a better question than how do I get a girl to like me that doesn't even know my name.

[t_mo (Banned)]

Originally Posted by BlackLabel767

Oh well, I guess I'll just have to hit up the frats this weekend and find some hoodrats to make me feel better.

And that my friends is a winning strategy!

Let your roomate deal with her bull****, and get some distance from her. You dont have to give her the cold shoulder just dont let her sleep in your bed and stuff like that.

keep it real.

[Bleachednblonde (Banned)]

okay ST listen up. I've seen alot of these questions and no matter what the circumstances it's always the same answer.

The famous old... girl a, girl b and sometimes girl c. Which one do i date? This is an incredibly objective question.

#1 st does not know these women... no matter how well you try to describe them. Asking a group of people with no prior knowledge of these women is like rolling the dice. Save yourself, as well as ST some time and flip a coin!

#2 if there isn't a clear answer in your mind which girl would be better then you don't know either of these women good enough and you should be dating both of them until there is a clear cut answer.

In the case that both of these women turn out to be on equal levels... DATE BOTH OF THEM. Were not talking marriage here. No one's saying you can't play the field. Just be honest about it.


__________________________________________________ ____________________________________________

Next, some of you keep saying, "ah i don't think i'm in the friend trap yet." Here's what you have to realize. Getting caught in the friend trap can take about 5 minutes depending on how you act those first five minutes. When i hear people say, "well we've only been talking for a few weeks" i think to myself... and you haven't screwed her yet??? I think furthermore people don't understand how the friend trap works.

First of all if you give off the wrong impression in the first 5 minutes you're already in the friend trap. Good luck getting out of that! Next, If you are not moving forward in a relationship with a girl you are in the friend trap. I don't care if she flirts with you all day and night, there needs to be forward progress. Getting into a relationship with a woman is not the long drawn out process that takes weeks or months. If you meet a girl, within 1 week at the absolute maximum it should be clear where you are going to steer the relationship.

SO RIGHT NOW I'M GOING TO THROW THIS OUT THERE. IF YOUR STORY STARTS WITH "I'VE KNOWN THIS GIRL FOR _________ AMOUNT OF TIME," AND THAT AMOUNT OF TIME IS MORE THAN 3 WEEKS AND ALL YOU'VE DONE IS POST ON HER MYSPACE AND CALL HER... YOU'RE MORE THAN LIKELY IN THE FRIEND TRAP. This isn't a marathon, it's a sprint. When i have a little more time i will draw out a timeline for you guys on how I believe things should work.

[p8ntballr1125]

Originally Posted by Bleachednblonde

okay ST listen up. I've seen alot of these questions and no matter what the circumstances it's always the same answer.

The famous old... girl a, girl b and sometimes girl c. Which one do i date? This is an incredibly objective question.

#1 st does not know these women... no matter how well you try to describe them. Asking a group of people with no prior knowledge of these women is like rolling the dice. Save yourself, as well as ST some time and flip a coin!

#2 if there isn't a clear answer in your mind which girl would be better then you don't know either of these women good enough and you should be dating both of them until there is a clear cut answer.

In the case that both of these women turn out to be on equal levels... DATE BOTH OF THEM. Were not talking marriage here. No one's saying you can't play the field. Just be honest about it.


__________________________________________________ ____________________________________________

Next, some of you keep saying, "ah i don't think i'm in the friend trap yet." Here's what you have to realize. Getting caught in the friend trap can take about 5 minutes depending on how you act those first five minutes. When i hear people say, "well we've only been talking for a few weeks" i think to myself... and you haven't screwed her yet??? I think furthermore people don't understand how the friend trap works.

First of all if you give off the wrong impression in the first 5 minutes you're already in the friend trap. Good luck getting out of that! Next, If you are not moving forward in a relationship with a girl you are in the friend trap. I don't care if she flirts with you all day and night, there needs to be forward progress. Getting into a relationship with a woman is not the long drawn out process that takes weeks or months. If you meet a girl, within 1 week at the absolute maximum it should be clear where you are going to steer the relationship.

SO RIGHT NOW I'M GOING TO THROW THIS OUT THERE. IF YOUR STORY STARTS WITH "I'VE KNOWN THIS GIRL FOR _________ AMOUNT OF TIME," AND THAT AMOUNT OF TIME IS MORE THAN 3 WEEKS AND ALL YOU'VE DONE IS POST ON HER MYSPACE AND CALL HER... YOU'RE MORE THAN LIKELY IN THE FRIEND TRAP. This isn't a marathon, it's a sprint. When i have a little more time i will draw out a timeline for you guys on how I believe things should work.

Thanks. That helps.

[Bleachednblonde (Banned)]

Let's talk about a very VERY general timeline of how things should work with a woman. This is by no means set in stone, but you should take into consideration that if your're on week three and you haven't had your first date... you're quickly becoming her friend!

INITIAL MEETING: First i'd like to define that the initial meeting is. This would be where you introduce yourself to her and vise versa. You should illicit interest in her and get her "intrigued" about you. You need to build a time bridge here because you're not going to see her or talk to her again for 2-3 days so make sure she's hooked. Finally, this HAS to end with an exchange of contact information. Either phone number, email or worst case scenario, instant messaging!

48-72 hours: No contact... NONE! no myspace, no aim NOTHING. If she calls, you ignore the call. After this period of time you call her. For the last 48-72 hours you've been SOOOOOO busy you haven't had time for anything! Got it?

1st week: First INFORMAL date should take place within the first week. Lunch, ice cream something "friendly" should have happened that involved face to face interaction where you're forced to sit down and talk to her for at least 45 minutes!

2nd Week: There should be casual conversation, phone aim whatever. Flirting should be escalating and it should be obvious that you are interested in each other. This will all build up to your first formal date. Now when i say formal i mean, it's clear that this is a DATE, not formal as in you dress up. The date should be fun and original. Now by the end of this time period you should have at least kissed the girl. If you haven't you're moving too slow! Consider this, a good PUA will have had sex at this point if he so desires!

3rd week and on: Dating should become regular but not repetitive and boring. There should be sexual escalation. Meaning things should be moving ahead towards sex. Now i realize some of you aren't ready for sex, so what i'm stating here is that kissing should have lead to making out or something. There should be progress towards what you consider the sexual barrier. You should also have a clear idea of what this girl is going to be in your life, (sex buddy, casual girl to date, serious monogamous relationship) and you should be moving towards that goal.

Not notice something about this... there's no stagnant period where you're not making forward progress! There's no 3 week period where you post on her myspace or just chat on the phone!! Now once again, this is not set in stone! I'm not saying this is how a relationship should go, i'm simply giving you an idea of how things should be moving so you can avoid the friend trap!
__________________________________________________ _______________

Okay now i want to talk about one more thing... how to keep yourself out of the friend trap the first time you meet a girl. I'm going to try to list some of the things i find to be the most important... i know a lot of us have talked about these things multiple times before so if you need more defintion go back and browse the threads. The best way i can think of to describe it is "James Bond like." I will make many references back to that.


-CONFIDENCE! You're posture, you're eye movement and you're tone. You should be calm and collected. Everything about your movement should say that you are relaxed and comfortable.

-MYSTERIOUS! Mystery is a good thing. It keeps a woman wanting more. James bond doesn't sit down and tell a woman, "ah i'm a spy, my family is like this, i do this yada yada yada!"
By the end of your intial meeting (unless you're aiming to take her home that night) a woman shouldn't know much about you. She needs to know that you're confident, witty, and sexy. THAT'S IT! When a woman asks me questions i'm very vague. "So what do you do?"
"I get paid to solve other people's problems." I don't just come out and say, "ah i'm an engineer."

-BE WITTY! Once again... James bond! The woman says something and he usually has some cocky witty remark to make.

-BE INTERESTING! Listen a woman has had the boring conversation with men a million times. What do you do, where are you from. Avoid that, you can get that crap out of the way after you've got her interested in you. Talk about random abstract things and then find ways to link them to little stories about yourself that display your positive qualities. These "teasers" should be the only knowledge she gets about you. You're only going to show her your positive qualities. I love to talk about piercings and tattooes with a woman. Then go into my stories about the body modifications i have had.

-NO NEGATIVE TALK! No "woe me" stories or gossiping. You should be upbeat and positive. If she takes a turn to negative town you steer her right back onto positive conversation.

-YOU MUST CLOSE WITH CONTACT INFORMATION EXCHANGE. There has to be some exchange of phone numbers or something and a hint of a future meeting. "That's so funny, it's so hard to find an attractive interesting woman to talk to! I really have to run, but i'd love to talk about you're peircings and tattooes some more. We should get together sometime for lunch so we can finish this!"

I promise you, if you follow these things when you first meet a woman you will almost never find yourself in the friend trap!

[NotUrface]

I have a really big problem with my gf, and i need some advice/ some guidance. I know that this is my decision but i need some input from some one else.

Heres the basics:

Believe it or not, i am a junior in high school, and i have been with the same girl for six years. Yes u read it correctly, six years. Now, before u say anything, i have had other gfs. My current gf, Alyssa (the one i've had for six years) and i always go on and off for a little while. I really really really really lover her, a lot. She is everything to me. However, i'm not the type to say, SHES THE ONE, because lets be realistic here, she is probally not. With all that sad, now on to my problem.

Lately my gf alyssa and i have just had such a rough relationship. She gets mad at me over alot of different things, however, i dont think these things are really a big deal. For instance, Last night me and her were just chilling on her couch watching TV, and all of the sudden i get a text message. I open it and read it. It's my friend melissa (who i have no feelings for at all) and all she said was, "Hey ! What are you doing tonight? " My gf grabs the cell phone out of my hand to read it. Now this dosent make me to happy but w/e, its no biggy, right? My gf thinks other wise. She gets all worked up over it. She says to me, "I dont wanna do this anymore, your killing me. Why do u have to talk to other girls like this. I dont want to do this" and shes starts crying. I just sit there and tell her its ok theres nothign to worry about because i really dont see the problem. Finally she gets a grip on her self. She starts asking me, how often do i text this girl, and how often do i call her (which is never btw) and what we talk about. I just tell her friendly things, because its the truth. I dont get it. Was her anger justified??? its a day later and she is still giving me a lot of attitude. I just hung up on the phone with her cause she said she was gonna take a nap and she says, "Have fun talking to melissa" and she hangs up the phone. I really dont think that this text message is something for her to be angry about.

I have however, smoked pot in the last couple of weeks and she was really upset by that. I understand where she comes from, so i agree with her as long as she dosent do it, i'll never do it again. I am even nice about it and tell her if she wants to try it a few times she can, just to see. She declines, thats her choice, w/e, i'm fine with that. However now she thinks when ever i go out with my friends i am smoking pot.

Point is plane and simple, she does not trust me absolutely one bit.

I really want to make this relationship work because i love her alot but i find it really hard to have a relationship when i get no trust or freedom.

She expects me to not talk to any girls ever just because she never talks to any guys. It is her choice to not talk to other guys, i NEVER tell her she cant. However she always trys to tell me not to talk to girls.

Should i end it? Should i try to make it work? i am so torn, i dont know what to do.

[shooterboy]

Originally Posted by NotUrface

I have a really big problem with my gf, and i need some advice/ some guidance. I know that this is my decision but i need some input from some one else.

Heres the basics:

Believe it or not, i am a junior in high school, and i have been with the same girl for six years. Yes u read it correctly, six years. Now, before u say anything, i have had other gfs. My current gf, Alyssa (the one i've had for six years) and i always go on and off for a little while. I really really really really lover her, a lot. She is everything to me. However, i'm not the type to say, SHES THE ONE, because lets be realistic here, she is probally not. With all that sad, now on to my problem.

Lately my gf alyssa and i have just had such a rough relationship. She gets mad at me over alot of different things, however, i dont think these things are really a big deal. For instance, Last night me and her were just chilling on her couch watching TV, and all of the sudden i get a text message. I open it and read it. It's my friend melissa (who i have no feelings for at all) and all she said was, "Hey ! What are you doing tonight? " My gf grabs the cell phone out of my hand to read it. Now this dosent make me to happy but w/e, its no biggy, right? My gf thinks other wise. She gets all worked up over it. She says to me, "I dont wanna do this anymore, your killing me. Why do u have to talk to other girls like this. I dont want to do this" and shes starts crying. I just sit there and tell her its ok theres nothign to worry about because i really dont see the problem. Finally she gets a grip on her self. She starts asking me, how often do i text this girl, and how often do i call her (which is never btw) and what we talk about. I just tell her friendly things, because its the truth. I dont get it. Was her anger justified??? its a day later and she is still giving me a lot of attitude. I just hung up on the phone with her cause she said she was gonna take a nap and she says, "Have fun talking to melissa" and she hangs up the phone. I really dont think that this text message is something for her to be angry about.

I have however, smoked pot in the last couple of weeks and she was really upset by that. I understand where she comes from, so i agree with her as long as she dosent do it, i'll never do it again. I am even nice about it and tell her if she wants to try it a few times she can, just to see. She declines, thats her choice, w/e, i'm fine with that. However now she thinks when ever i go out with my friends i am smoking pot.

Point is plane and simple, she does not trust me absolutely one bit.

I really want to make this relationship work because i love her alot but i find it really hard to have a relationship when i get no trust or freedom.

She expects me to not talk to any girls ever just because she never talks to any guys. It is her choice to not talk to other guys, i NEVER tell her she cant. However she always trys to tell me not to talk to girls.

Should i end it? Should i try to make it work? i am so torn, i dont know what to do.

So basically she got mad over a text message and pot, correct?

well smoking FTMFL. Dont do it again, you could end the relationship that way if u get addicted.

the text message. well lets see. Id say its not your fault for getting it, but it may not have been the greatist idea to answer it. If it was on viberate or any sound, and you both heard it, then you shoulda read it. But texted her back and been like sorrry im with my GF and cant do anything, or i already have plans. something that the GF would be more confortable with. Relationships are built on trust, and i think there is some lacking now. id go through all your texts now and delete any that have been from her/ other girls that Alyssa could get mad at.

Also through your phone book. I hate it when some girls put there number in it, and there like Lindsey <3 or have a smiley next to it, and when a girl you like goes through your phone, and they see the <3, its not the greatist in the world

[Blackdog455]

Originally Posted by fireisgood4u

Definatly in the friends trap. It doesn't take long for women to decide if you're a potential person they'd like to see, or a friend. Just move on and find other chicks.

Just because you hang out with a chick alot, talk in class a lot, and make her laugh doesn't mean she's attracted to you. You do that with friends and so does she.

i almost forgot to say that we flirt A LOT....not like it means anythign thouhg...

[NotUrface]

Originally Posted by shooterboy

So basically she got mad over a text message and pot, correct?

well smoking FTMFL. Dont do it again, you could end the relationship that way if u get addicted.

the text message. well lets see. Id say its not your fault for getting it, but it may not have been the greatist idea to answer it. If it was on viberate or any sound, and you both heard it, then you shoulda read it. But texted her back and been like sorrry im with my GF and cant do anything, or i already have plans. something that the GF would be more confortable with. Relationships are built on trust, and i think there is some lacking now. id go through all your texts now and delete any that have been from her/ other girls that Alyssa could get mad at.

Also through your phone book. I hate it when some girls put there number in it, and there like Lindsey <3 or have a smiley next to it, and when a girl you like goes through your phone, and they see the <3, its not the greatist in the world

Thanks for the advice. The phone was on vibrate however, and we both clearly heard it. I usually dont text to many girls so i never really have anything to hide. I just leave it as is this way she dosent think i'm hiding anything.

[paintsnipy]

i got a problem duh but anyway me and this girl r in the gray between friends and bf/gf and all my friedns r like wat how r u doin so im lost wtf do i do

[shooterboy]

Originally Posted by paintsnipy

i got a problem duh but anyway me and this girl r in the gray between friends and bf/gf and all my friedns r like wat how r u doin so im lost wtf do i do

speak english
type english
if you cant do either: learn english
and then reask your question

[Astronomer Sol]

Originally Posted by shooterboy

speak english
type english
if you cant do either: learn english
and then reask your question

Amen.

[Bobeo]

Originally Posted by paintsnipy

i got a problem duh but anyway me and this girl r in the gray between friends and bf/gf and all my friedns r like wat how r u doin so im lost wtf do i do

Like others said, type in English please.

And, there is no gray area between friends and a relationship. You are more than likely in the friend's zone.

One thing about the friend's zone is it is not impossioble to get out of. Just very, very hard and very unlikely. So unlikely that it is not worth the effort. Move on and enjoy your new friend.

[fireisgood4u]

Originally Posted by Blackdog455

i almost forgot to say that we flirt A LOT....not like it means anythign thouhg...

Nope sorry man. Just move on. Chicks that consider you a friend know they can flirt with you and not feel guilty of being a **** since you're just friends and she thinks it's mutual. Just keep in touch, move on.

Originally Posted by paintsnipy

i got a problem duh but anyway me and this girl r in the gray between friends and bf/gf and all my friedns r like wat how r u doin so im lost wtf do i do

Well take charge of the relationship and steer it towards what you want. If you get LJBF's flake on her.

[Blackdog455]

ya...well doesnt mean i still cant like her...either way ill try and "back off" alittle bit at a time i guess...

[12345421]

Originally Posted by NotUrface

I have a really big problem with my gf, and i need some advice/ some guidance. I know that this is my decision but i need some input from some one else.

Heres the basics:

Believe it or not, i am a junior in high school, and i have been with the same girl for six years. Yes u read it correctly, six years. Now, before u say anything, i have had other gfs. My current gf, Alyssa (the one i've had for six years) and i always go on and off for a little while. I really really really really lover her, a lot. She is everything to me. However, i'm not the type to say, SHES THE ONE, because lets be realistic here, she is probally not. With all that sad, now on to my problem.

Lately my gf alyssa and i have just had such a rough relationship. She gets mad at me over alot of different things, however, i dont think these things are really a big deal. For instance, Last night me and her were just chilling on her couch watching TV, and all of the sudden i get a text message. I open it and read it. It's my friend melissa (who i have no feelings for at all) and all she said was, "Hey ! What are you doing tonight? " My gf grabs the cell phone out of my hand to read it. Now this dosent make me to happy but w/e, its no biggy, right? My gf thinks other wise. She gets all worked up over it. She says to me, "I dont wanna do this anymore, your killing me. Why do u have to talk to other girls like this. I dont want to do this" and shes starts crying. I just sit there and tell her its ok theres nothign to worry about because i really dont see the problem. Finally she gets a grip on her self. She starts asking me, how often do i text this girl, and how often do i call her (which is never btw) and what we talk about. I just tell her friendly things, because its the truth. I dont get it. Was her anger justified??? its a day later and she is still giving me a lot of attitude. I just hung up on the phone with her cause she said she was gonna take a nap and she says, "Have fun talking to melissa" and she hangs up the phone. I really dont think that this text message is something for her to be angry about.

I have however, smoked pot in the last couple of weeks and she was really upset by that. I understand where she comes from, so i agree with her as long as she dosent do it, i'll never do it again. I am even nice about it and tell her if she wants to try it a few times she can, just to see. She declines, thats her choice, w/e, i'm fine with that. However now she thinks when ever i go out with my friends i am smoking pot.

Point is plane and simple, she does not trust me absolutely one bit.

I really want to make this relationship work because i love her alot but i find it really hard to have a relationship when i get no trust or freedom.

She expects me to not talk to any girls ever just because she never talks to any guys. It is her choice to not talk to other guys, i NEVER tell her she cant. However she always trys to tell me not to talk to girls.

Should i end it? Should i try to make it work? i am so torn, i dont know what to do.

You're a smart guy. Most guys that are in long term relationship's are like the guy on House last week. (Said he would die for his new wife even though she was in a coma)

Anyway, I think you should sit down and talk with her. Tell her she's going to have to start trusting you, or your relationship could start going downhill. Unless you've cheated on her before and she has reason to not trust you AT THE MOMENT. If she has that reason to back her up, cut off your contact with Melissa to show your girlfriend that you are really there for her and only her, until you gain her trust back. If it seems like it's taking a redicuously long time (I'm going to say 2 months max?) then it may be time to have a talk with her and possibly break it off.

[12345421]

Originally Posted by Blackdog455

ya...well doesnt mean i still cant like her...either way ill try and "back off" alittle bit at a time i guess...

Just find another girl and try it out for a bit. It can't hurt anything.

[TrixesOwn]

ok here is my problem. there is this girl like so much its rediculous. she knows i like her ALOT. And her old bf broke up with her like 2-3 months ago and she still hasnt gotten over it. Sometimes i think shes moved on. She plays me really bad and i dont know what to do. I know she has some interest in me, i just dont know what it is. We hang out like every weekend. And on saturday we went to a friends house to watch movies. Well i made a little move on her and grabbed her hand and just held it. She moved closer to me and put her shoulder on me and just like cuddled during the movie. Then the next day, we are talkin on aim and she like doesnt even acknowledge what went on the last night. Shes just like: Im not in a good mood blah blah... and in her away message she puts all this stuff up about how she misses her ex and what should would do to get him back. And im just confused b/c i thought for a second i got her to stop thinking about him and that i might have a chance and that shes movin my way. I just dont kno what to do and im really depressed cause i really like her. It just seems like evertime we get that much closer she does this to me and she starts talkin about her ex again. I just have no clue what to do and i need help really bad. This is reuining my life and making me really depressed.
thanks st

[JasionoX666X]

Remedy for clingy gf?
Someone help me ?

[Blackdog455]

Originally Posted by 12345421

Just find another girl and try it out for a bit. It can't hurt anything.

i guess....